The Platform

When our first daughter, Fatima, was born, I began to feel that my wife's attention had shifted toward her.

Before Fatima, I had Ayesha's attention largely to myself. Now there was this tiny new person in our lives who seemed to be getting far more of it than I was.

One day, I finally complained.

"It seems Fatima has come between us. She is getting more of your attention than I am."

Ayesha responded immediately.

"Why do you look at it that way? Think of it differently. You and I are standing together on the same platform, side by side, and both of us are looking toward Fatima."

I had to admit, it was a brilliant analogy.

It made perfect sense.

Thirty-seven years, four children, and nine grandchildren later, I am still standing on the same platform beside her, scratching my head, trying to come up with an answer that might beat hers.

Some arguments are simply not meant to be won. 😅

But over the years, I have come to appreciate that her answer was much more than a clever response to a young husband's complaint.

It was a lesson in how to look at relationships.

Too often, we think love is a limited resource—as though giving more to one person somehow means taking it away from another.

In reality, the strongest relationships are not built by looking at each other all the time.

They are built by standing side by side, looking together toward something greater than ourselves.

Perhaps she was right all along.

Whether it was raising our children, illness, financial pressures, careers, aging parents, or now even our grandchildren, every challenge became something in front of us, never something between us.

Looking back, I think that was the real lesson she was trying to teach me that day.